More than two years ago, my life was totally uprooted when Rob accepted a promotion to move to Atlanta. A city that I only knew as hot and far, far away from all my friends and family. With a deep desire to honor Rob, I followed. I knew that God had something important planned in this chapter of our lives. But, I really had no idea what was coming.
I had no idea that there were roaches down here. Truly. The weeks in our apartment, with no exterminator, were a little eye-opening.
I had no idea that I would suffer several minor bouts of depression that would cause me to want to stay in bed all day. Me, a woman who is known for being entirely too cheerful at 6am every morning.
I had no idea that we would still suffer from infertility after three years. That after multiple diagnosis, tests and medications we would make the difficult decision to stop trying to grow our family.
I had no idea the harm that infertility would cause on our seemingly wonderful "happy-ever-after" marriage.
I had no idea I would bury my father, a man whose importance in my life cannot be expressed in words. And, after more than a year, thinking of his death still takes my breath away.
I had no idea how God would use these trials to reveal to my own brokenness. It is a lesson that I continue to need to learn.
I had no idea that God would use these trials to reveal Himself to me. I had no idea how much God loved me. That, despite my depression, anger and selfishness He still loves me. No matter what I do. Not because of who I am, but because of who He is. He is a God that is constantly and continually coming alongside me. To give me strength. To give me love. He is my joy and my hope.
