the day I left…

Let’s face it; I knew I would be a basket case the day I left. I actually did okay and I didn’t cry too much until I got in the car and left my family standing in the driveway as I turned down the street. There was this well of emotion that came over me. I felt like I was literally ripping out a part of myself. It was harder than I thought it would be. Part of me wanted to laugh at myself. ‘Hey dork…you will see them again and you can always call them. Buck up lil’ Pilgrim, and stop crying. You need to be able to see the road.’ Part of me wanted to turn around and go back home, but I knew I needed to keep going.

Moving is challenging, exciting, and frightening. What will my job really be like? Can I really do this job? Will it be what they said it would be? Will the people I will be living with for a while really want me living there, or will they ask me everyday if I have decided where else I want to live? Will I find a church I can call home? Will I find and make friends? What if I get there and I hate it? What if I can’t stand Indiana? What if I fail? You can ask yourself questions all day long, but if you don’t try…if you don’t risk a little you will never know. I decided I would rather try and fail than not try at all. I am definitely one to overanalyze. Just ask my mother or any of my closest friends. So for me moving to Indiana was a big decision.

The drive down was interesting. Every time I had taken the roads to Indiana before it had been for different reasons; whether it was for school, for vacation, or just to visit friends. I had been on these roads several times before, but this time was different. I was soon to become a resident of Indiana. I was soon to become a Hoosier. I know, I know…a Hoosier. It still doesn’t sound right to me either.

Anyway on the way to my friend’s house I missed an exit. I was driving down I-65 and through Indy and onto 465 (the major highway that goes all the way around Indianapolis) as I had done before, but instead of going west on I-74 (the highway that takes you to my friends house) I kept going on 465. I didn’t think about looking at the compass in my car for some reason. Maybe it was the CD’s my sister made me that I was listening to, maybe I was still not believing that I was really moving, or maybe I was just tired. I don’t know, but when I ended up on the north side of town instead of the south side of town I knew I was going the wrong direction. To correct the issue I got of on one street and then got back on. I think I made about two figure eights that night before I realized where I was supposed to go. I didn’t want to call my friend and ask for directions. Part of me was really hoping that this was not a foreshadowing of how life was going to go in Indy.

I did eventually make it to my friend’s house. I grabbed a few things from the over packed car and I quietly let myself into his house. This was okay as he had told me they would be having Bible study and I could let myself in. When I came in I was met by my friend and his wife and three others who where part of their small group. I knew almost everyone in the room. It was so great to see all of their smiling faces and share a few long awaited hugs and hellos. It was a great way to start my stay in Indy. They all helped carry all my stuff in from the car and we had a few good laughs in the process as it was still very much winter in Indy.

That night as I lay in my new bed in new house I had a good chat with an old God. I thanked Him for being ever present and unchanging. I thanked Him for my family being so encouraging to allow me to pursue this. I prayed that He would help us all through it. I thanked Him for all the friends I had back home that I was already missing, and prayed that we would all continue in that friendship. I also prayed that we would all find new friends or new ways to be encouraging to old ones. I prayed for my new job too. I thanked Him for the opportunity and the excitement. I thanked Him for my friends here in Indy so willing and gracious to open up their home. I thanked Him in advance for a good night of rest.